Is Sex a Taboo Subject in Your House?
If the answer is yes, you need to make every effort to change.
For many families, sex has become something seldom discussed and often shamed. It’s embarrassing and even thought of as something dirty. How terribly tragic! Sexual intimacy is one of the most wonderful gifts God has given us… when it is appropriate and as part of a loving relationship.
Over the last few decades, sexual impact has become more and more pervasive in our society, some positive and some not so much. Regardless, the fact is that sex is all around us. It’s in our advertising, television, movies, music, fashion, those we call celebrities and more. Unless you’re totally isolated, you cannot escape the onslaught. And neither can your kids.
Despite many parent’s efforts, children are exposed to some level of sexual content many times a day. Reality Check: This is not going to be a genie you can put back in the bottle. It is here and it will not be going away soon. And maybe that’s alright. But in order to combat the potential and existing negatives, we must change the way we do some things.
When it comes to children, the change must include honest and factual discussions about sex. Sex education is critical and should be a concentrated effort between parents and schools. However, without a doubt, it should mainly be the parent’s responsibility. Kids need to understand how their bodies work and how the opposite sex’s bodies work. As a child’s maturity level increases, so should the depth of the message. And, believe it or not, in most cases, the conversations should at least begin before the child starts kindergarten.
Many situations and scenarios involving sexual content can be confusing to a child. Often things will go right over their heads and that’s fine, but when questions come up, are you ready?
Not only do you need to be ready, you need to get ahead of the game. When you and your child see something that can spur a conversation, you should use the opportunity. “What do you think that means?” “What do you think about that?” Ask questions! It will help you understand the maturity level of your child and will help educate your child to the facts.
One of the incredible benefits of these kinds of conversations is the open lines of communication that it creates. Your child will quickly learn that he or she can talk with you about anything, knowing that you’ll help them understand and to work through any issues.
For many people, sex can be an uncomfortable subject and quite frankly that is part of the problem. Address sex just as you do other health and body conversations. Teach kids about personal boundaries and respecting other’s boundaries. Share positive values of when sex is appropriate and when it’s not. If you’re one who baulks at having such discussions, do some research to help. There are a multitude of resources online to help guide you through how to begin the process. Don’t put it off. CRN has a few recommendations under “Learn More” on our website.
These conversations are vital, not only to help children grow up healthy, well-balanced and happy, but to help protect them. Often times, child molesters will rely on the sexual naivety of a child to trick and confuse them into thinking it is okay or even something the child wants.
The need to educate our kids is more critical than ever. Empowering children with the knowledge and skill sets needed to make the best decisions possible can make all the difference in this changing world.